Yep, it’s an unavoidable subject, even on a site for women (uh, especially on a site for women!)  Most of us are aware that it happens.  Frequently.  Like, All. The. Time! And although the “word is out” that it’s normal, I still get the sense that most women are uneasy about this.  I know, I know – women feel that it’s an insult somehow because he’s choosing his own hand over her hand/mouth/pussy/tushy (that’s a whole different post though!) She feels that somehow she must not be THAT good, if he has to diddle himself. And I don’t know why my little post here is going to convince her otherwise, considering she hasn’t paid attention to the logic before.  But here goes. Ladies – do not feel threatened by your guy jacking off! It has nothing to do with you.  Honest.  I asked.  Just to make sure.  Hey, we’re not born sexually confident – we have to earn it, which means asking and learning. And here is what I’ve learned. Most guys have an insatiable sexual appetite. Most guys like a little variety.  Most guys put sex, attraction, and love in entirely different categories. Enter masturbation. It’s quick, it’s easy, it means nothing. It releases that constant sexual tension that guys deal with – thank you testosterone, thank you very much.  Yep. That’s exactly what guys are looking for in the sex category. I’m not saying that’s what they think of when they have sex with you – because there’s usually one or both other categories involved (love, or at least attraction.) And that’s entirely my point. Unless you’re a prostitute (yet another subject for another post!), sex with you is at least about attraction and maybe even love. Comparing his jacking off to sex with you is the proverbial “apples and oranges”.  They’re just different. And it’s not that he’s choosing masterbation instead of sex – he’s choosing it in addition to sex. And ladies – we could learn a thing or two about that mentality! Once again, this is another subject for another post (I have lots to say on lots of stuff, huh!) but masterbation can be just as pleasurable, normal, and frequent for the ladies. Especially given the fact that many women out there haven’t quite figured out how to get to that “Big O” every single time with a guy. Anyway, I’ll save my opinions on female jacking off for another post.

So, back to guys jacking off.  I’ll take this subject one step further.  I had an experience that changed my life sexually forever (in a good way, fortunately!)  Several years ago, when my now-hubby and I were living together, I accidentally walked in on him in mid-jack-off.  There he was, sitting at our computer with his back to me, looking at some hot chick on the screen, whacking away.  It so caught me off-guard that I let out a little gasp, which of course made him immediately stop and turn around in his chair, looking as surprised as I felt – OK probably more so. I appologized, he appologized.  It was an appology-fest. I walked back out of the room, and no doubt his “session” was o-v-e-r.  However, as I walked away, with that image fresh in my head, I realized – OMG – I am totally turned on! Who woulda thought?  Am I a complete weirdo for getting turned on by seeing a guy jacking off?  What exactly about it turned me on?  Hmmmm.  And so began a new chapter in my sexual life: admitting that I LOVE to see a guy jack off.  Love it.  Who knows why?  And honestly, who cares?  That’s the beauty of what turns us on - it is what it is.  Period.  As long as it’s consentual and doesn’t hurt anyone against their will, why question it? Go with it.  Make it work for you.  Which is exactly what I did.  I worked up enough courage (OK, it took a little while – I was still earning my sexual confidence) to tell my dude.  And what I love about him (and most guys) is that he was not only cool with it, he tried to help me out.  One day, several months later, I came home to find him in our bed, Mr. Winky (I don’t really call it that, by the way – just trying to mix up the vernacular) in hand, waiting for me to “catch” him.  Which, as it turns out was kinda difficult since he didn’t know quite when I was going to be home.  Picture him jacking off enough to keep it up but not cum, for like, I dunno, 15-20 minutes….lol, poor guy!  And how awesome that he wanted to help me with my new-found fantasy!  Yep, I think I’ll keep him.  Anyway, my point (well one of them anyway) is that this jacking off thing has the potential to be more than just for him.  Since that infamous day, we now jack off for each other, in front of each other – and it is a huge turn-on for both us!  For those of you who haven’t tried it, I highly recommend it.

 My conclusion:  guys jacking off = sexy!  OK, I gotta go….um….yeah……you know…..